Blessed

[Thursday 25, 2013]

It.

Is. 

Finished. 

Today was day 46 in Cambodia. 

And it was our last day of teaching. 

We taught a session in the morning and then had an ice cream party in the afternoon. Much better than English class right? Yeah, we thought so too. But more on that later.

These past few days have been interesting. I somehow turned into a Bible-Government-English-teacher and I'm not entirely sure how that happened. *The government teacher part is due to the election that is taking place on Sunday and the students interest in how to discuss it in English* I decided that it would be really great to get my students reading aloud in order to work more on pronunciation. We grabbed the only English bibles that I could find at the moment *those little orange Gideon's bibles* and jumped in. They chose to begin in Matthew chapter 3 and so they all took turns reading 5 verses aloud and then looking for words in the previously read verses that they didn't know or understand the meaning of. Well it was a great system except that I have no idea how to explain the meaning of some words. And how do you define a word that means one thing but is being used in a different way. How on earth do I teach metaphors? And how do I explain what "doth" means? This continued on all week and we somehow made it out alive y'all. Somehow. We reached the Beatitudes and I had a realization. I don't know what it is, but everything is so much more "real" in Cambodia. The sky is bluer, grass is greener, fruit tastes sweeter, I laugh from my inner most being, and I realize things that I should have known all along. It's not like I'm learning brand new things everyday, it's more like I just diving in deeper. And I love that. 

So we got to Matthew 5 and I knew what was coming next. I dreaded having to give the definition for meek and trying to explain to them what being poor in spirit meant because I honestly don't know sometimes. But as I listened to the boys read, it hit me. Another "dive in deeper" moment. See, when they saw the word "blessed" they didn't read it the way I've grown up hearing it. *bless-ed* They saw the word "blessed" so they said the word "blessed"... as in blessings.  

Then it all made sense.

Being "bless-ed" wasn't something that you had to earn.  

I've grown up thinking *without necessarily realizing that I thought this way* that these Beatitudes were some nearly unachievable goal that you wanted to reach in order to be "bless-ed." In order to be given a gold star or a checkmark on the chart. It was like I was saying, "Yeah okay God, I'm going to try my hardest to be poor in spirit because I'd really like to end up in heaven." When in actuality He is saying "You're blessed when you're at the end of your rope. With less of you there is more of Me and my rule." Or "Okay God, I won't be reeeeally sad when I'm sad because I know you'll take care of me." That's not it at all. He is saying, "You're blessed when you feel you've lost what is most dear to you. Only then can you be embraced by the One most dear to you." Or. "Meek, God? what does that even mean?" His response? "You're blessed when you're content with who you are-no more, no less. That's the moment you find yourself as a proud owner of everything that can't be bought."

*I would like to give full credit to The Message for the verses* 

So yeah. 

It took like 14 twenty year olds to help me realize that I'm not aiming for this perfect score. I'm being richly blessed by my Father in heaven that loves me very much and wants nothing more than to have a relationship with me. 

I'm not trying to be bless-ed. 

I'm being blessed day after day. 

Who's the Bible teacher now, huh?

After our morning class was over, my students asked me to pray one last time. This prayer consisted of me thanking God for the opportunity that I had this summer and for my students and for their wisdom and brains and huge hearts. Of course, I teared up a bit and my voice may or may not have cracked. But hey. I didn't care. 

After lunch we recruited Chanty and Roth to take us to the store to buy ice cream for our party that afternoon. Well our quick trip to the store kind of turned into a 2 hour *or so* adventure and hunt for ice cream. We went to Dairy Queen and Swenson's and even a huge supermarket. Dairy Queen didn't sell tubs of ice cream and their cakes were too expensive for the number of people we were feeding. Swenson's was expensive but the amount of ice cream we would be buying made it worth it... except that it was all one flavor. We decided to jump across the mall *Swenson's and the supermarket were in a mall* and check out the varieties and prices in the supermarket. After about 15 minutes if deliberating and calculating, we headed back to Swenson's to by the huge tub. Well when we returned there was some confusion and they told us that the price increased by $10. Uh. Okay? W stood there and listened s Roth and Chanty took the reigns and attempted to make sense of the situation. By the end of the conversation, we found out that the tubs weren't for sale. Back to the supermarket for the four of us *but not without buying sundaes for our wonderful escorts.  

So we ended up with 6 containers of ice cream: 2 vanilla, 2 chocolate, 1 chocolate chip, and 1 strawberry. Oh and don't forget the bottle of chocolate syrup. 

Phew. 

We survived the ice cream excursion and laughed the whole way home. Our friends are so wonderful here. We made it back to the school all in one piece and made sure all the ice cream was put away. Sarah and I were then taken back to the hotel to rest until our ice cream party that was scheduled for 4:00. 

The part was a success and they ate nearly all the ice cream. There was only a little left in the second chocolate and vanilla. Hooray for ice cream! 

We taught the children for the last time and even received a HUGE hug from one of the older girls. Sarah and I looked at each other and we both had tears in our eyes. Seriously y'all. The absence of physical affection has been hard. 

After class, we took Sokhom and Srey Nang to Viva for a thank you dinner. We enjoyed a nice Mexican meal, *Srey Nang got a steak... She's not a fan of Spanish cuisine*  visited for a while longer, and then headed back. 

And now here we are. 

Our English teaching career has come to an end. 

What? 

It honestly feels like we've only been here for like a week and a half. I can't believe that we'll be leaving in 6 days. It's surreal. 

I. Am. So. Blessed. 

This summer has been incredible. It has been full of tears and peaks and valleys and food and sickness and laughing and language and joy and miscommunication and it has been the best summer of my life. No doubt. 

I can't imagine having to say goodbye to these beautiful people in 6 days. 

But for the next 6 days, I pray that I can pour love and encouragement into them. 

They deserve every bit of it. 

Goodnight friends. I love you all and I'm so blessed to have you.

Cassie